Leadership by example

 

Did you know that (in extreme cases) job loss can lead to depression and PTSD?......anybody?

Yeah, me neither. I had to learn that little nugget of wisdom the hard way. 

Of course, the beauty of life is in its ability to roundhouse kick you in the head with bursts of harsh truths and uncompromising realities. Then again, maybe those things fall under the category of “what makes life beautiful”, in that its unpredictability illuminates certain possibilities that one wouldn’t have even thought possible had it not been for the unforeseen debacles that they had to experience. But, maybe the beauty in the dark times that we all go through is in the notion that there are people that can lead us through them, mentors in the seemingly endless mineshafts of inner turmoil and outer despair. But, as per my usual self, I’ve jumped ahead. So, let’s take a step back from my unusual attempt at self-reflective analysis and start over.

A while back, I had the misfortunate of being laid off. The whys and the wherefores are inconsequential to this article. The point was it was a devastating blow to me. And rightly so.

See, there are those in life who would view a job as simply a means to an end, i.e. pay rent, buy food, get girls, buy property, make babies, retire and die (although I’m sure there are those who would debate me on the actual order of those things). I’m not one of those people. Sure, all of that sounds great, but I’m the kinda clown that needs to believe in what he’s doing. I know it sounds cheesy, but I can’t do what I do if I’m not down with the company. While that empathy makes me a great employee, the downside is that it makes termination hurt all the worse.

And I didn’t just feel bad for it. I was overcome by this overwhelming sense of failure, as if I tried to measure up and had failed in a spectacularly miserable manner. At one point, I honestly wondered how the ship designers of the Titanic felt when they found out about what happened (if that little piece of trivia is lost on you, then either you haven’t heard the news or you haven’t seen that cringe-worthy movie….in which case, you’re reading my blog so welcome to the 21^st century).

So, I did what almost anybody would have done, I went home (or the closest approximation to that for me). While there, a kind soul was nice enough to help me secure employment, although I doubt they were really aware of what they were getting themselves into.

Almost right away, I started screwing up. Sure, nobody gets it right on the first day…. or the second day…. or even on the first week. But soon, I was screwing up repeatedly. Suffice to say, this wasn’t a high point for me. At one point, I screwed up so badly that it couldn’t be ignored.

I’ll spare you the details of what happened next, but the highlights were as follows:

-          I was called in for a meeting with my boss.

-          Boss tells me that they know that I’m trying but I screwed up

-          I begin experiencing a mini panic attack and wonder if my boss would lose even more respect for me if I fainted right then and there

-          Boss tells me that this can’t be overlooked

-          I begin to have trouble breathing

-          Boss invites me to her church group's weekly get-together

-          I look my boss in the eye and wonder whether she’s having a stroke (for just saying that) or if I’m having a stroke (for having heard the most unlikely thing)

Yeah, I was surprised when she suggested I meet some people in her church group (and no, I’m not here plugging a local church organization, so all you secular cry babies can calm down). Naturally, this took me completely by surprise since I walked into our meeting expecting to have been fired twice in one year. Realizing that I had nothing to lose, I said yes.

Again, I won’t bore you with the details, so here’re the highlights:

-          - I attend the first get-together where I’m introduced to seemingly ordinary people. We eat, drink, have a merry time, sit down and talk (and by talk, I mean the kinda talk where you’re forced to let your guard down and just be as raw as an Eddie Murphy comedy special)

-          - I come to the realization that……y’know what, I know this is a personal piece, but maybe I should try and maintain some dignity, so I’ll keep my revelations to myself

-          I came back and continue to go to these meetings with this fine group of people, mostly because the experience has been helpful, but also because they always got a decent spread going

But something happened. I actually got better at my job. Almost overnight. I won’t say church group was a cure-all since I’m still the perfectly imperfect individual that I am, but it helped. So much so that I began finding post-its from my bosses, letting me know that I was on the right back. And there it is. The point that I was trying to make. Sure, I could have gotten straight to it, but you needed to know the story to understand the significance of this for me.

The point I was trying to make was that good leadership begets loyal employees. But good leadership isn’t just knowing how to inspire but also knowing that every employee has something to offer, even if it isn’t obvious from the get-go. Good leadership is knowing that while every employee is an investment, there is value within them…. but that value can only be realized if, and only if, leadership is ready to see it.

This time around, I was blessed with good leadership….and good leadership got me through the mineshaft and out into the sunlight.

Thanks, leadership.